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E-mail sucks. Email is takes up to much time. E-mail is completely a waste of time. E-mail is the leader in spam. Half of everyones e-mail account is curropt. It is filled with spam. Spam that comes in the form as porn. There are many different advertisors who use e-mailing as a way to try to reach new consumers.
Have you ever looked around you, at your place in life, and found that you have more than one place in life? I found that I have as many places in life as I know people. Each person puts me at a different place in their life. Whether it be in some cases a friend or a best friend or a love or a person that just sends you really huge emails all the time and you have no idea what you did to deserve it. My point is this, how can we have just one place in life when we affect so many people in different ways? It cannot be. I can prove this by using myself as an example. Eryn and I love each other, for her, that puts me somewhere near one of the greatest things to ever happen in my life (Eryn, I can assure you, you are very [okay, so a little over] that). But then there is a boy that used to go to my school; with him, I ranked somewhere near Scum of the Earth thats been eaten through by many earthworms and icky bugs. I just cant be both, so I had to ask myself if my place in life was somewhere between the two, or it I was just one of the two. Then, it came to me that I was both. Weird revelation. I hope that made sense to all of you.
Now, I am going to tell you all about one of my favorite philosophical points that is mine and mine alone the rewind button. Ever sit down sometimes and think God, I wish that I could just press the rewind button and go back to do it all over agian? Well, my feeling is, if you hit the rewind button, dont you lose all that knowledge that you gained since the point you go back to? Will you not then make the same choices as you did the first time? Will you not then choose to hit the rewind button when you come to that point in your life again? If you do, wont you then forever trap yourself in a loop of time that you can never break free of and therefore, your life stops at the point you hit the rewind button? You might as well die instead, because your life would go no further. Once again, I hope that made sense.
This is a point that my friend taught to me. His name was Jack, and he is now resting comfortably with God after he took his life a few years ago We, as people, never do anything without some measure of greed motivating us. Think about it, you can list a thousand selfless acts, yet you can say this to any one of them they were done to make the doer feel better. Someone jumps out in front of stranger to stop a bullet. If the person doesnt take the bullet, will that person ever get rid of the feeling that they could have done something and did not. I like the example of a fathers daughter being kidnapped. The father wants his daughter back because without her, he would be miserable. If she were to die, he would never get to experience her growing up. He would be really more concerned with whether or not he would get the joy from his daughters life, not so much that she enjoy her own life.
You see, as humans, we are programmed from birth to survive. Back in the days of the cavemen and primitive man, that survival was purely physical. But, as we evolved, we evolved emotions, which we also needed to survive. So, the modern human survival instinct is to protect not only the physical, but the emotional as well. This leads to greed, which becomes the motivating factor behind all of our actions.
Dont think about these things too much, if you do, they can ruin life for you. You have to read them, understand the meaning. Decide whether you agree or disagree or somewhere in between. Then, forget them unless you need them. Because if you think of all this, its a pretty horrible commentary on human beings. If you think about these things too much, you will begin to hate people. Thats a bad thing. Dont let the fact that people are imperfect get to you. Just forget it, because if you hate humans, then you must hate yourself, and, as in the case of Jack, it will lead you to destroy that which you hate.
I just thought of something I have no idea why I am writing all of this to all of you. It doesnt really make sense does it? To just tell all you everything I think when I dont even know half of you all that well. But you know what, but oh well, Im doing it, and Ive gotten this far, so why stop now?
We, as humans have a tendency to need other humans to know what we think. I use email and personal communication to get my message(s) across. Some use (and I am in no way condoning these acts) bombs, murder, rape. Others use pen and paper, computers, body language, lifestyles, and, of course, the internet.
It is very easy for us as people to say that our problems are worse than anyone elses. It stems from our need to have something, just one thing, that gets the attention for us and no one else. The problem is that because were all human, we all think along the same lines, and we know that by elevating our problems above everybody elses we can get more attention, feel sorry for ourselves, hoping it will make others feel sorry for us. Just a thought...
Myth Anybody is better than anybody else.
Truth Theres no way to measure.
Some people tell me that I my writing is some of the best they have ever seen. Some people think I write because I can. Some people think I write to get a point across. Some think that it is to tell a story. Some think I do it so that I can sell it. Some think that I do it so that I can brag about what I can do. I assure you all, I do not do it for any of those reasons. I write because I have an idea that can be transformed into words that can then be read by others. I write because I love to see page after page of paper filled with my handwriting. I do if because I love to create things. That is my passion in life, that is what drives me forward. I write because it lets me create anything I want. I used to build with legos as my main thing. Then, I drew pictures. Then, thanks to one person, I embarked on writing. I have not stopped for three years, and I have not plan to ever stop. Whether people like my writing or not is not why I do it (If I were to say that it did not matter to me what people thought of my writing, I would be lying. My writing is something that comes from me, and every human cares about what they create, and therefore what people think of what we create).
Do any of you wonder why I am writing this? Because if youre still wondering, I figured it out. A lot of you think of me as a nut or a goof, or dont even think of me. I am trying to do what every person alive tries to do alter your perception of me to what I want you to think of me. I guess I dont feel that I want you all to think of me as just the good that does the voices and the aliens (though those are extremely fun to come up with and write...). I wanted all of you to think of me (and perhaps some of you do) as a person that thinks about things, has a little knowledge (not much, just a little) about people. A person that understands why people do what people do (which is something I cannot write, but I know very well).
Myth Theres no meaning to life.
Truth Its different for each person.
Have you ever looked in the mirror, only to wonder if youre the reflection, and your reflection is only you? that you spend forever deluding yourself that you exist and that what happens to you is only an illusion. Do you ever wish that you could pass through the mirror to find out what was really on the other side. Maybe just a bunch of backwards writing, maybe a new universe, better or worse than our own. Or maybe, just the wall behind the mirror.
In my brief sixteen years of life, I have come to realize something. Most (and I say most because there are a very few exceptions) romantic relationships are very much like paper. Once you fold it, or crumple it, you can never fully repair the damage. You can sit there and try smoothing it forever, all youll accomplish is to rip the paper. Once a crumple is made, it can never be repaired fully. It is always there, a reminder of what happened to cause the damage. The only way to erase all signs of the damage is to destroy the paper and recycle it so that it is a new relationship. I hope that made sense to everyone.
Myth Love can only end in tradgedy.
Truth If its love, it cannot be tragic.
(many people, I am sure, disagree with that last one)
Well, this must have been a wonderful email to wake up to. Its really late now, Ive been at his for a while (an hour and seven minutes). Hmmm, need to find some people who I can call at 100 in the morning so that I dont do this too much...
If anybody has an answer to this question, Id really like to hear it. The question is Why do humans have the drive/want/tendency to destroy themselves?
Can someone answer this question? What the heck is it about bad clam chowder that makes a person write everything that I just did? I really hope that someone out there can answer that. It really is a question that I would really like answered. Hang on, my stomach just turned and it made my brain turn over... Im putting the engine in drive, and here I go again... (anyone else smell smoke like the kind that comes from am engine thats having trouble?).
You know, I have found something to be an extreme rarity in this world (that was a little vague, Ill do better with the next sentence). People tend to have no love for themselves. This is a problem, even the bible (whatever version youre reading) says that a person must love oneself before others. I have found that there are very few people who actually like who they are and love themselves as people. It may sound conceited to love oneself, but isnt that the only was we can truly be happy? Because no matter who were with, no matter who we love, if we dont love ourselves, what we dont love will haunt us. Most of us get along without even noticing it, not even caring. Some of us (I am in this category) have found that love for oneself. Some of us dwell on what we dont like about ourselves until we really dont like ourselves (this tends to be a very destructive, sometimes deadly thing for many people).
I hope that all of you find a love for yourself (if you havent already). Its like Whitney Houston sang The greatest love of all is inside of me. The greatest love of all is the love for ourselves.
Look around yourself. Look at your life. What has happened in your life that was your fault? What has happened that was truly someone elses fault? What has happened that you think is someone elses fault, but if you look closely, and though you may hate to admit it, is truly your fault? Someone once wrote What we like to do is assign blame to everybody else but ourselves-- no matter how many times weve done it before If youre interested in who wrote that, ask me about it.
Myth We must all work towards the common good.
Truth Common Good can never be defined.
Well, my eyes are getting blurry, the times I have to hit the delete button are rising, so I need to go take a chug of Diet Coke.... Be right back...
Okay, Im back, but I didnt get Diet Coke, I got RC Cola-- more caffeine.
Myth Sleep deprivation makes it harder to think
Truth Sleep deprivation is a great stimulus to the mind.
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